A guy has cancer. He dies.

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Thanks

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How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

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what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them..

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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Not mine I want no credit...these were made by two genius's What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the holocaust? Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

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If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

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What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

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What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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A muslim gets on a plane. He is then flown to his destination.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To eat it of course

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What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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