A horse walks into a bar... just kidding the doors were to smal.l

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Do not lose hope, you have always considered me hard to get, while this time, I came to you. Next time too, I kinda owe you.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He had a job interview precisely 10 minutes after this event occurred.

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They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

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why was there a man outside the 56th floor window? he was a window washer and needed the money.

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Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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what do you call an overweight 80 year old white man trying to be a pimp ? Mr.Fredrickson

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Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

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what happened to the man with no arms or legs when he was pushed down a hill? nobody knows he is still going ........................................................................

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A man, trying to be polite, asks his irritating coworker, "Did you get a haircut?" His coworker responds, "No, I got them all cut!" The man groans and shakes his head.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike with no handle bars or pedals.

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

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What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

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Women's Sports

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How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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What is the different between a blonde and a rock? nothing.

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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