Can you see this brett? Connor

thumb_up thumb_down +15

drugs sex alcohol are as funny as AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +15

no

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

There was an Irishman and an Australian who walked into a bar. There was also an American, who didn't. Why didn't the American walk into the bar? He was a midget.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When crossing the river, why the old lady die? She was hit by a falling brick that fell from an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar and says, "Ow."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What sauce do chicken's hate? Bone suckin' sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the black kid get for Christmas? A bike that his father paid for with the salary he made as an accountant at a local bank.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

-When is a door not a door? -Never

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock who's there? rock rock who? rock on the ground, don't trip

thumb_up thumb_down +11

24

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops