Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

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What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

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Your mom is so dumb, she has difficulty acquiring a job to support her family.

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roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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knock knock who's there GET IN THE VAN!

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What did the lover say to his lover? I love you

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Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

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John Hammond from 'Jurassic Park' looks like KFC's Colonel Sanders. Which is ironic, since chickens are descended from dinosaurs...

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A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

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Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

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What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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