Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

What did Grandma give her grandson Billy for Christmas? Scarring memories of sexual abuse.

Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

Why do black people eat so much fried chicken? Because it's delicious!

Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

There was once a joke without a proper ending and so

A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

What do you call a bird on the beach? A seagull.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

8

A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

How do you kill a black guy With a gun

Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

Two strippers are out of work. So they turn to prostitution.

where are you?

Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

Guess What? What? Get in the van.

How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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