Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tragedy.

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What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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your mama so old, shes dead.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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