Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Clouds are white.

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

Son: "Mommy That Boy Over There Beat Me Up" Mom: Good I Like When You Suffer

To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

what just happened when chuck norris falling from the sky..? Starts making a wish

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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