Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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meatspin.fr

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

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Bill went into a store and bought a bagel. However, after eating it, he realizes he meant to buy a doughnut. He tells the cashier that he meant to order a doughnut, and asks for his money back. The cashier says no and the man leaves.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops