Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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Why did Mike Tyson say he would eat his children? Thats mean! friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Why not just vi0late them REALLY REALLY FUCKlNG HARD! Its a Win/Win/Win/Sore ass situation.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

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Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Okay lord and master, now get lost, I am trough with you, I have other things to get done, XD My nose is so itchy XD

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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So a horse walks into a barn.

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I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to Hitler? Nothing, because they clearly never made contact with each other, owing to the fact that Osama was born approximately 13 years after Hitler had committed suicide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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