why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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What did Shaq do when he first met Rondo? Play Basketball

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what did the British horse say to the man who owned him? nothing all he sad was neigh.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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So a horse walks into a barn.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Okay lord and master, now get lost, I am trough with you, I have other things to get done, XD My nose is so itchy XD

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Why did Mike Tyson say he would eat his children? Thats mean! friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Why not just vi0late them REALLY REALLY FUCKlNG HARD! Its a Win/Win/Win/Sore ass situation.

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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what did the murderer say to the man... i'm going to kill you

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops