Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Try not to laugh at this joke... Knock knock Who's there? Ha ha ha Ha ha ha who? I told you not to laugh

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

antijoke is the best website.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

I'm so full I could stop eating.

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

Why is it stupid to call your son Bethany? It is commonly a girl's name.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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