I don't know which one is emptier my bank account or my love life

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Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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"What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights." *Your suggestion is contradictory considering the fact that you are implying "Women's rights" is more humorous than "Women's rights".

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how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

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What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Kade was sad. He had finally got a girlfriend when he realized he actually liked men.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Want to hear a dirty joke? Jimmy fell in mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jimmy took a bath with Bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a clown.

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Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

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What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Everybody will die

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was standing up.

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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A woman walked into a bar. Many men laughed at this unthinkable notion because women belong in the kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops