Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

what's white, sits around all day, and sucks on tits? a baby.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

Knock know! Who's there? Aids! Aids who? Aids! Aids who? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I'm not aids!

Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are dead

Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

What's brown and slimy? brown slime

What did the Chinese guy say to the black guy? Nothing, the black guy dosen't speak chinese.

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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