what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

2 persons in an elevator then, one guy says: dude! smells like your sister! and the other guy is not there

Okay, after this one then...

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

Poop

I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

You know whats funny? Women's rights

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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