- Anti Joke

Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

What did the man say to the woman before he had sex with her? "May I have sex with you, please?"

Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

What's worse...a thousand dead babies in one joke...or one dead baby in a thousand jokes?

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had stage 4 skin cancer.

What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

A gay man,a black woman,a seven year old child,a liberal,an atheist and an asian walk into a building. A hijacked plane flies into the tower they were in and kills them all on a cold September morning.

one time, a fancy business man walked into a bar. but then he figured out that he wasnt supposed to be there. so he politely apologized to the mortician an and he granted him permission to exit the closet.

How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have Somthing To tell you F*** You

Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

How do you greet a small mexican man at Chuck E. Cheese? Whatsup Jose

What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

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A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops