What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's big, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree will kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What are the last words of a child dieing of cancer ? Nothing because he is to ill to speak

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens when an Asian with a boner walks into a wall? He breaks his nose

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

24

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why could the little girl not swim? She had rabies.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

thumb_up thumb_down +4

My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops