Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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Poop

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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Do you know why one side of the V formation that geese fly in is longer than the other? Because there's more geese on that side.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops