Why did little Jimmy go crying to his mummy? Because she was shot.

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A fat man walked into a hot dog.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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u know whats a crime? rape

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RACIST JOKE: how to start a footrace in ghana role a donut down a hill

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

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How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

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What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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knock knock who's there aids aids who ... dumb ass

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What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

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Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

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What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

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[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

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Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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