what is green an invisible? this cabbage

What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming? Here come the elephants. What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming wearing a pair of sunglasses? Like wearing a pair of sunglasses as a dhitty disguise would confuse me. I took law at UCLA before becoming a professional game hunter and I've been in this business for almost 10 years. I think I know an elephant with or without sunglasses.

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

You wanna see something really scary?

"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

burn baby burn your nanas burning

Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, Im very sorry.

Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

one day ill be as old as you but you'll be older then too.

A horse walked into a bar, and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?". The horse replied, "It's evolutionarily efficient to have an elongated skull so that I can eat vegetation with ease."

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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