josh is a skinny headed keppy mong

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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I went to the bookstore to buy me a Where's Waldo book. I looked through the store and couldn't find it anywhere.... Well played waldo, well played.

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they're dead. idiot.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue In Soviet Russia Poem tells You -Ben

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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Why did the fox cross the road? To chew on the chicken carcass.

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Did you hear about the Polish couple taking selfies while on vacation in Portugal? They fell off a cliff and died in front of their children. True story.

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How did the marines cross the minefield safely at night? Under a full moon

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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A man walks into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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