Why haven't any women go to the moon? Cause it still doesn't need cleaning.

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? When he first entered the world, Chicken was a lonely bird. Nobody else liked him. Not even his mother. He was small and scrawny, and whenever the farmer came to feed the pigs or shear the sheep, he would get scared and hide in between two pieces of wood. One day Chicken woke up and his family was gone. Although they had never loved him, his heart was tender, and he was desperately concerned for them. After hours of searching for them, he overheard Cow speaking to Horse: "It's a tragedy, really. They were such a happy family. But now their off to the land of KFC, forever lost in the sea of chicken wings. But Chicken was determined to change his family's fate. He escaped the barn and ran into the woods. There he traveled day by day, and at night he hid from the hungry wolves. Life in the forest was tough, but no tougher than the loss of loved ones, so he kept going. On and on and on, until the forest ended and the city began. It was a new world to Chicken. He had never seen so many different buildings and contraptions. His eyes had never before held the wonder of the majesty of such a strange place. After traveling through the dangerous alleys of the city, he finally found it: the terrible land of KFC. The place where humans' dreams begin, but chickens' end. The place of horror and death and unfairness. The place that summarized Chicken's whole life. He was here now. The only thing separating him from his family was a road. A road that was so small compared to his previous trials, so incomprehensibly tiny when placed next to the gaping hole in his broken heart. So the chicken crossed the road. Then he got hit by a bus.

What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

hello there i am a male from the small town of balamory and i have just found a very large oblong with an acute right angle strongly attached to the left hand side........do you think i should hand it to the new york extra torestial services ?

In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

whats green and dont fit? a dead epileptic.

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

Yo momma's so fat that when she died of congestive heart failure, your family had to pay extra for a larger coffin to bury her in.

what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your roommate, I forgot my keys.

why did the kid stop eating his breakfast...two Penn state officials knocked at the door

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

Roses are red. Violets are violet. Violet is a color already.

A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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