Why was the black guy being talked to by several policemen? Because he was advertising a new renting deal on an apartment downtown and the two policemen were openly gay and have a right to live together.

Did I tell you about when I hit a cat with my car? No, what happened? I hit a cat.

What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCM8MQg1bn9y38H8Irhuxx-g

Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

what has genitial warts? me

What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

A mute man writes a joke that would only be funny to blind people.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Parkinson's dl;ghd;jgfldsj;foshdgoljdlkfnjslpaoijejknjvnoidnmaokepinjndonfvio

Thumbs up if u dont have aids:)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

Midgets' mouths are perfect height for, kissing other midgets.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

Roses are red grass is green get on th bed and I'll fill you wilpth my cream ;)

What did the penguin do in the desert? He died .

Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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