- Anti Joke

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

What do you say to a dead man who knocks on your door? Nothing, you shoot him cause he's a zombie

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

MAKE

What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

Q what do you do when your friend tells you hes a homosexual A. you tell him that you will accept him and can still be very good friends

I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

knock knock whos there steve i dont know you go away

What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

What do you call an arabic man who sells bombs for a living? A business man.

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

Q:What's better than getting 500 million dollars A:Nothing

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

How do you kill a dead baby? You can't, it's already dead.