The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

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Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the Mexican jump the American border? Because he wanted a better paying job to support his family, and legal immagration to the States is a lengthy and highly difficult process.

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What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

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whats big, black and red all over? My mom when its that time of the month

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: to get to the gay guy's house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

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Q: What is the leading cause of pedophilia? A: Sexy children.

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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What did taxi driver say to the passenger? Where to, sir?

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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Depends how you look at it, I like some girl, she and that girl gets along, I get along with the two girls, and yeah, I make them fight to the death as I consume the weakest one and make the new one my wife of darkness! Well, actually, threesomes, but NEVAH, NEVAR!! *shakes fist towards the skies* with another man! Now if my waifu wants to have some fun with a girl, I say why not (and then she asks if I want to join always so far), its genetics, you know, each caveman had like 600 wivus and he did not have time to bang them all, now let those genes go trough MAN for a couple of millenia, and he becomes the KING OF DEMONS... ME! Those other scumbags are a whole other story. Oh, and the 600 wivus did either go without sexytime, or you know... I mean you do KNOW that women are like comfortable naked together and yeah...

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely, caucasian man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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