Why is the light always red? Because the city has been in an economic depression and does not have the money to fix the traffic light's.

Why did the chicken cross the road---- because he's having financial and relationship related problems that make his life so hideously unbearable that he wants to kill himself and because he's a chicken and cannot overdose or hang himself he goes for the most viable option as to run across a busy street in hopes of getting smashed to oblivion by a car

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

D/M/Y ~~ Take 21/12/2012 Flip it upside down Take the 2's out from both ends (1/12/201) Take out all the ones and two's (//0) Take your zero and turn it 90 degrees to the right Take out the forward slashes What you are left with, a potato.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

What do you do If you can't afford a hair cut? Don't get one.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

a white kid is called on by his teacher he is promptly sent to the principle's office after not complying.

What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

Why was the black man kicked out of the restaurant? Blatant racism was still very prevalent at that time and place.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

The joke below this comment is stupid. Lets go Mets

Two muffins are sitting in an oven, they get burned because the oven was left on for to long and they end up being thrown away.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

WE BE-ETH YON KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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