Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't sexual abuse, which her sister had experienced while traveling around the world in 2007.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

A elementary school child was waiting at the bus stop for the bus to come. All of the sudden, the bus comes around the corner, pulls up, stops and he gets in.

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

Q: What did the architect say after he tripped? A: My mother died of cancer when I was 6.

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

One man says to another "Hey you have banana in your ears." The other man replies "I can't hear you, I have bananas in my ears."

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

What do you call two banana's on someone's feet? Garbage.

Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

Why did little Suzie spill her drink? Since birth, she has lacked a jaw.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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