how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

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Homonyms should be band.

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42

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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How do you give an 80 year old man a heart attack? Hold a gun to his head

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MOOOOOOOOOOO

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How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey

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How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Roses are red violets are blue you better run I see you

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What do you call two black guys holding up a store? Really strong.

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops