When life gives you lemons, you are probably crazy because life cannot give you lemons.

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Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

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why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

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koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

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Why couldn't the woman drive the car? Because she was a woman.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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knock knock, Whos there ? ( runs away ) trololololololololol

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Your text.

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-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

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snooki

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

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Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

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What is a black man's favorite fast food restauraunt? Varies.

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Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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Q. How can you find true love? A. Google it...duh

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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