why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

how does your hair keep changing lengths? due to my countless hours of grueling sessions in chemotherapy due to what was recently found as a terminal cancer, i wear wigs

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An old jewish man, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q: What did Tommy do when it was time to go to bed? A: Go to bed. Q:What did Tommy do when it was time to wake up? A: Kill him self.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black, white, and red all over? An ovulating mulatto woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the blonde get a good occupation? Because she had a great education in a private school.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

adele is so fat that when shes on a plane she makes the skyfall

thumb_up thumb_down -22

So many dudes win with your mom who even knows if i'm your father!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Did you hear about the gay midget? He came out of the cupboard.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What does a scouter say about his power level? It's over 9'000!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q. Dr.evil? JHHHHHHHHOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a homosexuall man? Homosexuall man.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas. A: A bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's brown and sticky? A stick!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

heat!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A programmer, and engineer and an accountant meet up for an after work drink. Afterwards they go home to their separate apartments and think how socially inadequate they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A white man, hispanic man, and a black man walk into a bar together. They order cokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -24

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops