hickory dickory dock no one cares

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whats worse then girls playing sport ? girls cutting grass

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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Hello everyone, if you couldnt tell, the most popular joke was removed because it wasnt even an antijoke, if you have a joke that isnt an antijoke, post it somewhere else, if you dont know what an antijoke even is then get the f*ck out, thumbs up if you agree with me

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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three friends are chilling one day and they all think they belong in Guinness book of world records the first guys says i believe i have the smallest arms in the world, the second guy says i believe i have the smallest nose in the world and the third guy says i hate to admit it but i believe i have the smallest dick in the world. So they all go down to Guinness book of world records inc. and the first guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST ARMS IN THE WORLD" the second guy comes out and says "YES I DO HAVE THE SMALLEST NOSE IN THE WORLD" the third guy comes out all depressed and mad and says "WHO THE HELL IS JUSTIN BIEBER"

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What did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? AIDS

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So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

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What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

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Cripples are lame.

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Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? A komodo dragon

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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EVAN RAMSEY -CAD CLASS!

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why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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This is an anti-anti joke. I don't expect him to get it.

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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