Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

roses arent always red, they can be pink or white. violets are violet, not blue. your pretty lets have sex.

A black man walks into a bar and treated with equal care

Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

Two nuns in a bath, one nun says to the other "wears the soap?" the other confused replies "I am sure you mean 'where' is the soap" and hands her the soap.

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

why did the chicken cross the road he didnt he was hit by a van

What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

Kim Kardashian got a job.

What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

Knock Knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who?

Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

- Why Mexicans have small steering wheels in their cars? - Because of this they are able to drive a car in handcuffs.

A bar walks into a man... Wait...

why is my phone broken i dropped it

What do you call a black man with no education? An unfortunate outcome of our meritocratic society.

When life gives you melons, your dyslexic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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