Two Jews walk into a bank. They make a deposit and leave.

What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

A group of Germans eagerly await the FIFA football rankings. England is fourth.

Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

Grab your Taco, you've pulled a dyslexic Mexican

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

why was the boy sad...because scooby doo shot him with a harpoon

How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

what do you call a white guy on a bus load of blacks guys? probably his name...

Why does Sally sell sea shells down by the sea shore? To support her growing crack addiction that is ruining Sally's and Sally's families lives

How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

When I walk in the rain, I get wet

A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

A man keeping specific track of time,eagerly waits for a punch line.

why did the black man die? the man bled out, and doctors did everything they could.

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red Oh no! Someone's been murdered in my garden!

Hi. Hello. I live in Iowa. Same. Im your neighbor. Same. I like corn. Same. Im gay. Same. HAHAHAHAHAHA gotcha! No i really am gay and the fact that you thought that was funny saddens me deeply.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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