Why Can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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F: what is BLUE and has 400 whells ? Q: NOTHING !!!

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What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

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josh roberts goes to church to take advantage of religiously confused young boys

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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a bumble bee walked into a bar, looking tired and worn out. 'long day, eh?' said the barman. 'yes' replied the bee. 'i was flying along to collect some honey when i noticed a large obstical obstructing me. i stuck my pointy needle in it, and according to legend, i will die in short hours to come' suddenly michael jacksons thriller flicked on in the jukebox, the bumble bee boogied all night long until he slowly passes away in the early hours of the morning. long live boogie bee.

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What's the difference between a wife and a chef? A chef has the choice to leave the kitchen.

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

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a man walks into a bar, he is injured severely and needs medical attention stat, he is rushed to the hospital where he dies that evening

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How do you make a fireman cry??? Kill His Family

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Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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