Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

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Why did John stay home from school? He died.

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

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What's black and blue and lives in a kitchen? A 1940's housewife.

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A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

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Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

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A baby walks into a bar, I find that very unlikely as very few baby's can actually walk.

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What's faster than a black man with a TV? Light.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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who likes fried chicken? almost everyone because fried chicken is delicious

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What did the boy with no eyes get for Christmas? Glasses

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm blind.

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.

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I need a good anti joke....

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

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Why wasn't the black guy allowed into the bar? Because the bar was closed.

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Spotto

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hi im phill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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