A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The bartender is institutionalized for paranoid schizophrenia.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Socks.

One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

Whats worse than an offended chicken walking around with a squirrel stapled to its back? A crusty old man with hepatitis peeing on 10 babies.

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

A white guy, a hispanic guy, and asian, a black guy, a philipiean guy, and a wait what am i doing?

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

a man walks into a bar. ouch.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

Little kids wear superman underwear. Superman wears Chuck Norris underwear.

What did the overweight blind kid get for Christmas? His parents died in a tragic car crash and he was left alone, fat and blind to fend for himself

How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

7

Women.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

Penis

A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

Why did Sally fall off the swing-set? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the shark put on a dress? She was getting ready for prom.

There where ducks sitting in the bath One Duck truns to the other an says "could you pass me the soap" The other duck truns and replies "dont call me toast"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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