Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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Why couldn't the old man read the street sign? Because there were no words. Just an arrow designating a trun up ahead.

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Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

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I saw a poor man named rich

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whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

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"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

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What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

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Chuck Norris is an average human being!

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

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what did the jewish kid get for his birthday......Striped pajamas

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Police Report: A 100 year old man was beaten to death on his centennial birthday. Sources claim to say he was "getting his birthday punches"

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What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

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The WNBA.

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press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

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What did the officer say to the black man? You're under arrest.

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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How do you spell eight? 8

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knock knock go away

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What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

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How are bananas and friends alike? If you peel their skin and eat them

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops