Men, get on the boat.

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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A Mexican walks up to a fence in Texas and watches as the police take away his next door neighbor for tax evasion.

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

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How do you get a priest to cry? Stab him.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What's worse than having AIDS. Being Black.

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roses are red, violets are violet.

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25

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1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

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Q.whats the differecne between a bicycle? A. orange,...a vest dont got no sleeves.

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Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

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What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

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If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

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What white and black and red all over? The wife who refused to report that her husband abused her.

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Why shouldn't you play poker in the woods? Due to the stereotypical lack of human population in such an area, it would be excruciatingly difficult to find a partner with which to play competitive card games. I suggest trying solitaire instead.

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What do you call a black man yelling into a crowd? a preacher

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what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

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What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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