What's Mexico's favorite sport? Cross Country

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

water, hydrated silica, glycerin, sorbitol, PVM/MA copolymer, sodium lauryl sulfate, flavor, cellulose gum, sodium hydroxide, propylene glycol, carrageenan, sodium saccharin, titanium dioxide all adds up to colgate. SO AS A MATTER OF FACT, CHEESE PLUS PIE IS CHICKEN. CONSIDERING THE FACT THAT I LIKE SAYING CHEESE, JACK AND JILL WENT UP THE HILL BECAUSE THEY WERE BAGELS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why couldn't sally go on the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Jesus REAREAREAREVENAGNCEREALLY SAY when he was walkin on da waterz? And I bless this object which shalth now be known as the surfboard, Amen. Seriously, im a Christian, that sounds kinda cute in a weird way... Like aww, thats why he walked on water, not because of terrifying super powers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

69

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How does Bob Marley like his donuts? He doesn't, he tragically died of melanoma in 1981.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. who's driving? The black guy because he just turned 16. His school mate the Mexican child is still only 15 and he will have to wait a few more months before he can drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Whats the difference between a friend and a bestfriend? A: The other one has best in front of it dumb A$$

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Johnny got hit by a bomb. Where is he now? Everywhere. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Johnny

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

yo momma so fat i abuse my wife

thumb_up thumb_down +11

watashi no namae wa ramune desu

thumb_up thumb_down +11

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What time is it? Ask chuck Norris! Gosh!!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

obama's promises

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops