Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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I baked you a pie! Oh boy! What flavor? Apple.

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Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

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A horse cantered into a bar.

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Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

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What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

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Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

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Miley Cyrus is Twerk Queen

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what did one mental hospital worker say to the other? Billy your not a mental hospital worker, give heather back her clothes so I can escort you back to your cell.

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What did the blind man look at when the girl showed him her cleavage ? ... Nothing... He's blind... >_>

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum went to the loo and out came you

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There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

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Q. What's better than a breadmaker? A. A sandwhich.

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What is worse than a bus falling on you? A bus with Mama June inside it falling on you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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