Farts smell bad!

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Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

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Do you want to hear an anti joke? No.

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Why don't they sell aspirin in the jungle? Because it is not financially viable to sell pharmaceuticals in a largely unpopulated area.

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Why is poop brown? Because you're a shit.

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The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers

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A Nazi and a Communist walk into a bar. 10 million Slavs die.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What do a a pickle and a rabbit have in common? They are both green...except the rabbit

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Why was the black man escorted out of the bar. He was 10

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Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

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Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

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whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

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What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

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When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

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A man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is crippling his family.

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What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

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OH NO, ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!!

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The grass is always greener on the give me a blowjob.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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