A fish swims up stream for his natural spawning cycle. The fish was out of shape and died from heart failure.

How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

Why did the mom go to jail? She committed infanticide. lol.

If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

Q: What did the prostitute say to the other prostitute? A: I have AIDS.

96

What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

What did the girl say to the boy? I don't know it was a private conversation

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

Society.

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

How do you make someone feel stupid? You throw a smart person at them

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

what did the train say to the other train choo chooo

What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

Q: What's a Mexican's favorite sport? A: Cross Country

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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