What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? A:Pull the pin and throw it back

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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I just made up a joke! How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Seven. The ending needs some work...

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How many Wal-Mart employees does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, assuming he can reach it safely.

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What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

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Josh kissing a girl

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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ron:jim i cant get the toaster to work jim:dude thats a thats my car!

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What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

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A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

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How do you stop a train? Throw a fridge at it.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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what did the women say when she found out that superman was clark kent. i know that you are superman clark kent.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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