Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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I was in the grocery store on a sunday afternoon, and i saw a black man. To my surprise, HE DIDN'T BUY ANY FRIED CHICKEN?!?!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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Ben Colbert is gay

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

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What did one mail box say to the other? NOTING! In-animate objects cannot speak...

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Whats 0+0 0

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Q: How do you get a jewish girls number? A: You roll up her sleeve

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Cornbread ain't nothin wrong with that.

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Why did the car suddenly stop? It was at a redlight.

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What did the lady say to her child? Nothing sadly the baby was taken to Timbuktu by the father. Ps: it's a real place look it up

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Sometimes people get confused when sentences don't end the way they elephant.

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I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

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Why did the little girl selling lemon aid die? Someone drove by and threw a fridge at her

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

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Knock knock (No one is home)

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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Two drunk men were in a bar fight, they smashed beer bottles on each others heads and walked away because it hurt.

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What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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