What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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An asian walks out of math class

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Brian Singmaster. Look him up, he's cute.

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What's the difference between a mouse and a dinosaur? A lot.

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women leaving the kitchen

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Not your dead mom.

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A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

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What's white and sticky? Glue

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Is this a chair?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

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A horse walks into a glue factory..

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I would think one would be sufficient, though political affiliation shouldn't have anything to do with the situation. Unless the lightbulb was residing in a specified meeting place for members of the Republican party. Also, if the building was a more public institution for gatherings, which could imply larger ceilings, then two might be needed, just for safety precautions.

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Snooki want smoosh smoosh

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I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

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How many atheists does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Whats9+10 19

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

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why did the man paint his house? because he never wanted to paint his house

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A man in a bar says "I'm drunk", immediately 10 men take of their clothes

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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What's worse than finding Michael V. in your class? Finding Curtis W. in there instead\

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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