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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Roses are gray Violets are gray I am a dog

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

What's green and if it falls out of a tree it kills you? A pool table.

Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

Q: What's worse than 10 dead babies in a tree? A: I'm sure there are lots of things.

What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuse 7 was a convicted serial killer. >----->

What is brown and sticky?

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

What did the racist wife give to her black husband on their anniversary? Golf clubs because he liked to golf.

cms.......?????

Q: what's black, white and red all over A: a penguin in a blender

Do you know karate, shorty? Or are those bruises from an abusive father?

Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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