My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Apple hates Blackberry.

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

Bang Bang Get the hell out of the house, it's on fire.

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...