What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

How come the man could read the directions? Because it was right side up.

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

A black man approaches a customer service desk and asks for help. He is racially discriminated and receives no help with his problem.

Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

Knock, knock. Who's there? "Dwane!" I don't know any Dwane. Perhaps you have the wrong address. "Oh. Sorry to have bothered you!"

What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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