Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

You dropped something.... Yo lip

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats 2=2? gonorrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

thumb_up thumb_down

First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

thumb_up thumb_down

The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops