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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

Knock knock... Knock knock... Knock knock... Unfortunately, nobody was home to sign for Marks parcel.

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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