What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

thumb_up thumb_down -34

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

thumb_up thumb_down -42

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

thumb_up thumb_down +9

MRLSIXBWBSOVODKSHAIFKQJXIGJNRMWKSJDIVIVKEBWBEBKGKBODJWBEBJRRKFOBPBPDJWVECTNYLLNNIFUDJEBWKSOXOVOFJSBSBDKCKFKTKEBEJDLDOFIDKDJDHDBENSMSKSKSKSKSJDJDJSNRNTNTKDPQPWJSHCHCJDNEBBSJSKC

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops