knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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What is the difference?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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