Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Who's the fastest kid in AA

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how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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I like your words "He without an equal, also stands alone was it?"

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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