how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

thumb_up thumb_down -100

If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

thumb_up thumb_down -122

You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -140

WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down +59

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

thumb_up thumb_down +55

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Somebody elses cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Canada

thumb_up thumb_down +43

why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

thumb_up thumb_down +39

69

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did the chicken cross the road? A manufacturing defect in the chain link fence released several chickens who are now freely roaming the area.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops