Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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what do you call five mexicans pushing a truck up a hill? Five mexicans stuck in the middle of nowhere looking for an auto mechanic.

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

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Q.who is Tiny, a lion and has no friends and is a bald eagle? A.Rory Johnston

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

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Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

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What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops